Today was Father's Day. And because I know that this day could have been difficult for my boys, I planned. I had this idea that they would make Sean a beautiful card and I would buy balloons, attach the lovely artwork and we would send them off to heaven in grand style.
Did the balloons leave the ground with the card attached? No
Did Mama have to take the card off the balloon and have to send it up sans card thereby ruining the special moment? Yes
Did the balloon then get stuck in a tree? Yes, momentarily
Did I then take the kids to Chuck E. Cheese and then the power go out? Yes
What a day. Thankfully, the kids didn't really care about the cards as much as I did and they shouted up to the sky "I love you Daddy" a million times and the power came back on and really wonderful people made us feel a little more like family today. So, it is true that all is well that ends well.
Today I read a quote "Fail, fail again, fail better." I keep rolling those words around in my head. I feel sometimes like the gravity of this situation will crush me. That I will monumentally screw up my children. But as they lay their heads down at night and I gather them close to me and apologize for my missteps and pray for them and tell them how very much I love them, that maybe we'll get through this together. Our knees will be skinned, our feelings will get hurt, we'll cry and we'll laugh. But, I'm not going to give up. God has simply entrusted me with too much.