Tuesday, March 19, 2013

Old Lyme has suffered a loss.  A vibrant 41-year-old woman lost her three year battle with breast cancer.  She leaves behind a fourth grader, a first grader and a preschooler.  This one hit me hard because John was in the first grade and Hunter was only a year younger when we lost Sean.  And they're all boys.  I heard that she said, "I just don't want my boys to grow up without a mother."  Those words echoed Sean's who worried about the boys growing up without him. 

I think about their wedding days when their wife is dancing with her father, who will they dance with?  I think about all that I'm trying to teach my boys.  That they really need to tell their wife how beautiful she is every day.  She'll really like that I say.  That they should let the girls at the bus stop go on before them even though they don't understand why yet.  That just because burping and farting may be funny, there is truly a time and place for it.    I'm trying to teach them to be good citizens but more importantly to be good and kind men and husbands.  My heart is grieving and praying that these boys will be surrounded with good strong women to guide them. 

Today I read one of the letters that Sean left me.  Just about nearly did me in.  Made me heave and cry it was so beautiful.  He wrote, "Wife, mourn for me.  Mourn bitterly for me.  But when that time is done, smile.  Live your life and breathe.  Then breathe again.  I'm with my Father."  These words carry me.  They give me hope and a future.  That one day in the future I will be able to talk with Sean again.  That all is not truly lost.  God, may this family have that same comfort. 

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